Katie Watch

Wonderful news has come to our attention here at Milkcrate. According to several sources on the Information Super Highway, Katie Holmes is "looking forward" to filming her "character driven" thriller set to start shooting in Melbourne next month.

The almost too ironically named blog TomKat Crazy tells us that Katie's usual entourage will be on toe - previous son-in-law to Australia Tom Cruise with poor little Suri Cruise, thus fixing the Australian economy even more.

I wonder if Posh and Becks will flock over for a bit of oranging in the Chapel Street sun? I see a new segment coming to Milkcrate - Victoria in Victoria anyone?

Welcome to Katie-Watch - So Much to Half-Smile About.

By now, those of us in Melbourne are thrilled to have learned Katie Holmes is set to shoot a thriller in ol' Melbourne Town.

A couple of weeks ago, we busted open our copy of The Age, to discover not only will Katie be gracing the Docklands with her oh-so-cute* half-smile, she'll also be boosting the local production sector thus FIXING the Australian economy!

Amazing.

It's only fit that Milkcrate Magazine - Melbourne's very own blog dedicated to all things completely unrelated to milkcrates - brings you Katie-Watch (TM). When Katie lands in our fair country with her crazy religion and her mad attempts at acting, we'll be right here, on the internet, bringing you the news.

The film will be a remake of the 1973 telemovie Don't Be Afraid Of The Dark which is due to begin shooting in coming months. It has been written and will be produced by Guillermo del Toro, who recently produced the very scary El Orphanto. Creepy dead kids with sacks on their head - the stuff of nightmares. A little like Katie's oh-so-cute* half-smile.

*May actually be more vom-inducing than oh-so-cute.

More on Three Wolves and Moons

Washington Post has all the news on the latest meme to go viral on the the internetz, the Three Wolf Moon Shirt.

Particular lolz to be had when a partner and art director of Mountain - the people responsible for this epic fashion disaster - responds.

"Three Wolf Moon" is sold out, and the Mountain has started printing up a fresh batch. It seems that the wolf theme was growing in popularity even before the Internet hipsters descended"

And this golden line: "Wolf shirts are super hot right now".

Amaz'n Amazon

Browsing through Amazon this morning, I stumbled upon this fine piece of apparel - and it's user reviews.

Pros: Fits my girthy frame, has wolves on it, attracts women
Cons: Only 3 wolves (could probably use a few more on the 'guns'), cannot see wolves when sitting with arms crossed, wolves would have been better if they glowed in the dark.

So if you're like us here at Milkcrate and you appreciate fine user reviews, wasting time and wolves click away and enjoy.

"Cross my paypal with credits and I'll read your keyboard"

I think personal keyboards are the new time capsules.

People spend more time in front of their computers now than they did 10 years ago. Many hours per a day, several days a week are spent there. Those not of the anal retentive persuasion eat, drink and and do other things in front of the computer.

What's trapped behind [and on] keys says a lot about a person.

For instance, my keyboard would be a blessing for an archaeologist as its almost a complete archive of my personal habits.

I have a black battered keyboard. Beneath the keys is a jungle of fuzzy tobacco, ash, loose hair and dog hair. On the keyboard itself there's always a few ash-turds, little melted spots, mass amount of grime and a generous smattering of suspect human fluids.

My favourite keys are 2, spacebar, M, A, N and >. The 'control', 'windows' and F3 [which brings up the 'find' toolbar] keys are covered in thick grime as if never used.

Maybe there's a new job description out there? keyboard readers are the new palm/tarot readers: "I see you have a history of homosexual activity and have a reluctance to commit as you feel people are inferior to you. I also see that you have no control in your life and cant find your path. You also have a lack of vitamin B and will die of lung cancer."